Monday, November 22, 2004

He makes a good point...

Check this out. It's a grade-A wondrous rant that, like any good rant, borders on the hilarious.

Thursday, November 18, 2004

An open letter to Osama Bin Laden

Dear Bin,

Well, George "The Crusader" Bush is back for another 4 years. (Why would you ever doubt the stupidity of the American voter?) Of course this means four more years of war, more attacks on who knows which Arab countries (one dead towel-headed-sand-nigger is as good as another to the boys from Texas) and, I fear, this means you will be attacking us again as well. While I would certainly prefer that you don’t, if you really must, I ask you to please consider a target other than New York City. I know the Trade towers were a big splashy P.R. thing, but... Just consider these facts: 1) You’ve already done New York and no self respecting terrorist wants to be seen as endlessly living in the past; 2) New York is an ethnically diverse community where many Moslems live - if you really want to strike at the infidels that are defiling your holy-lands, you don’t want to fry your brethren in the process; 3) New Yorkers are an educated bunch that voted for John Kerry and generally despise George Bush. Why not focus instead on your true enemies: Bush, Chaney, Delay and the ignorant racist yahoos that support them; 4) Bush lives in Texas which by the way is a miserable, violent and thoroughly fundamental Christian ("read Crusader")state. Now I realize that nuking Crawford, Texas is not nearly as dramatic as New York or Chicago but just think how much the destruction of his ranch will make W boo hoo hoo (P.S. Word is he fucks his pigs regularly and I’m told he’s currently hot on one particular sow); 5) A strike at the midland of the U.S.A. would really unnerve racist red-necks who basically couldn’t give a shit if you blew up New York anyway. Think about it, they hate us almost as much as they hate you. So, in conclusion, if you are indeed planning to nuke or bomb or poison some part of the U.S. of A., please consider Texas - if Crawford is too small-potatoes for you, how about Dallas or Houston (Houston is, after all, the 4 th largest city in America in case you weren’t aware)...or maybe Florida (now there’s a cess-pool that needs terminating). I mean, if you want to hit the Cowboys where they live, they don’t live in New York City, believe me. Besides, I personally guarantee that if you nuke Texas all Europe will cheer for you and give you lots of money.

Sincerely yours,

P.S. If I were you, I’d send some extra Mujahaddin over to Syria A.S.A.P.

Saturday, November 13, 2004

Check this out.

A friend recently sent me this link and email. GodDAMN the Japanese come up with some far-out shit every now and then. I'm not convinced this would make any more sense in Japanese:

Go to this web page, click on link for "DEAD OR ALIVE: FINAL" on the left side of the screen list of films. Watch the trailer and tell me if you can figure out what the hell this movie could possibly be about?

Wednesday, November 10, 2004

Umor Mobile another idea that I think could be applied to the Umor mobile.

When the 'mobile hits an urban center, there should definitely be a high-powered cell-phone jammer on board. This will make it seem as if the UmorMobile's 'music' is actually responsible for the disruption in communications. In any event, "BE HERE NOW" will no longer sound like a mere suggestion, as the UmorMobile's real reality will replace the cellphone user's virtual one!