Sunday, December 14, 2008

Conversation tonight over dinner

Me: Hey, when we get back to New York me, Kane, Kol and Bill are going to build a shanty down town somewhere...

Wife: Why?

Me: Art.


Monday, November 17, 2008

Cities On Flame

This is the far left portion of a large mural I painted in the hallway outside Mrs Keller's art classroom at Dobbs Ferry High School in 1979. Amazingly it, and many other murals, are still there today. It gives me chills to think about how many kids grew up seeing these (sadly prophetic) images.

Friday, October 31, 2008


As you can see, no Hermes Trismagistus and no Oroboroi, neither living or dead.
(Greetings from Cairo.)

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

In search of Hermes Trismegistus

E/UMOR-iator Em, on assignment in Egypt.
My plan is to find Hermes Trismegistus to beat a living Oroborous out of him or, short of that, to demand explanation as to why one is not forthcoming. He may or may not reside somewhere in this part of Egypt, the Sinai Peninsula.
If needs be I'll proceed to Cairo and search the streets and bazaars for some kind of leads. I'll start, perhaps, with Alembic vendors and then see if the homonculous-generating equipment sellers have seen site of him.

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Our Children Are In Peril

This Is A Public Service Announcement
Brought To You By

© Fear Now For The Future
the makers of Sphinct-o-Print
The Only REAL ID

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Friday, October 17, 2008

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Umour grows in Upstate New York


umour grows...

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Cowboy Johnny Give Me A Gun!

"Cowboy Ronnie (or Georgie or Johnny) Give Me A Gun
Cause I Just Wanna Have Some Fun!

Draft Me - I'm Ready To Kill
Draft Me - I Know That You Will
Draft Me - I'm Angrier Still
Draft Me - Or Someone Else Will

I Wanna Go Somewhere For Cowboy Ronny
Just To Kill!"

"...Merry Christmas Goldilocks
here's your son wrapped up in a box...
hope he's not late for Christmas!"

excerpts from two major radio hit songs
©1983 Doppler Effect

Friday, October 10, 2008

Kill A Commie For Mommy


Help Protect Your Mother
By Killing Someone Else's First

Wrap Your Fist In A Flag
And Punch Out Her Lights

It's Us Against Them Isn't It?

Then we'll have more time to attend
to all those other people we don't like

Watch out, that could be you next!

(the preceding statements do not necessarily
express the views or concerns of the author)

Wednesday, October 08, 2008

The Black Legion

for more information on The Black Legion
click HERE.

Saturday, October 04, 2008

McCain's Real Message

Isn't it obvious? Consider: 1)He's old and has been "serving his country" for a long long time. 2) Did I mention he's old? He's 72 and he can do the math. 3) He hired one S. Palin who is very obviously not someone to put in the Whitehouse. 4) He officially stopped campaigning during the fiscal crisis. 5) He's apparently backed out of Michigan and may end up backing out of PA. The underlying message is pretty clear, no? He stepped up to the plate one last time just so the Republicans wouldn't be a no-show in November, but as the Hillbilly masses continued to recognize someone who could scoop the dole out to them, he's has to make his real message clearer and clearer. Watch for him to fake a heart attack or something.

Friday, October 03, 2008

Nero 2001

just 7 minutes of meditation a day
can help to clear the mind


Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Atomic Bomb Games

Give One To All The Children In Your Life

cause everyone knows

genocide should be fun, right?

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Richard Nixon Countdown Calendar

why is there no George W. Bush Impeachment Countdown Calendar?

August 9th, 1974

We The People


Saturday, September 27, 2008

7up Lithiated Lemon Soda

7up Lithiated Lemon Soda

Bottle Cap c. 1950's

Imagine a "7 and 7" with Lithium.


Who Knew?

Who Remembers?


for the 7 HANG*OVERS


7up Sweetens The Stomach


7up Prevents Hangovers

well it had Lithium in it

what would you expect?

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Monday, September 22, 2008

My Plastic Hut

My Plastic Hut is Educational

My Plastic Hut is a Funny Toy

I can Build My Own Plastic Hut

Thank You Plastic Hut

I Love You

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Umour grows in Garrison

Umour is everywhere. Cheryl spotted this fine Umourian site as we drove north on Rt 9 through Garrison on the way home from Oktoberfest. She turned the car around and made me snap some pictures. That day she also took the See/Hear/Speak No Evil picture posted here earlier. She's quite the budding Ritual Specialist!

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Chornobyl Butterfly

is this an upcoming album by umour?

or a compilation of SPLURGE?



what is it really?

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Umour at Oktoberfest

Umour sees no evil at Oktoberfest.
Umour speaks no evil at Oktoberfest.
Umour hears no evil at Oktoberfest.
Umour drinks Spaten at Oktoberfest.

Monday, September 15, 2008

WARNING: Peanuts May Contain Peanuts

This Is A Public Service Announcement
Brought To You By

Marlow Honey Roasted Peanuts
Ingredients: Peanuts, Sugar, Honey, Butter and Salt.

Shut up!

it's got what plants crave

Militia Of One: No Conspiracies

© Fear Now For The Future
the makers of Sphinct-o-Print
The Only REAL ID

Thursday, September 04, 2008

E/UMOR Mini-Expedition: South of the Thames

A E/U-MOR expedition to the South Bank of the Thames River during low tide, including a visit to the Graffitti grotto.

The London Eye...
South of the Thames and the Graffitti Grotto 015

..and slightly to the right...
South of the Thames and the Graffitti Grotto 013

...the other direction:
South of the Thames and the Graffitti Grotto 012

The Graffitti Grotto:
South of the Thames and the Graffitti Grotto 007
South of the Thames and the Graffitti Grotto 003
South of the Thames and the Graffitti Grotto 002

South of the Thames and the Graffitti Grotto 001

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Umour hard at work

Umour hard at work

Here we see the ritual specialists utilizing a patented UMOUR(TM) technique to extract and bottle the particularly potent dream fluid that is emitted during REM sleep.

Between Kane, Kol, and Loudmouth Bill drilling away, this E/UMOUR-ite was unable to continue sleeping due to the earsplitting racket and so moved into the studio in the deep hours of the night. (At first I mistook Loudmouth Bill's snoring for an alligator gargling industrial waste.)

Much more, I am sure, will emerge over coming days and weeks from the Ritual on the main UMOUR site, so keep posted.

Thursday, July 03, 2008

Rooting out terrorists before they strike!

WASHINGTON - The Justice Department is considering letting the FBI investigate Americans without any evidence of wrongdoing, relying instead on a terrorist profile that could single out Muslims, Arabs or other racial and ethnic groups.

Law enforcement officials say the proposed policy would help them do exactly what Congress demanded after the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks: Root out terrorists before they strike.

Although President Bush has disavowed targeting suspects based on their race or ethnicity, the new rules would allow the FBI to consider those factors among a number of traits that could trigger a national security investigation.

As an upstanding citizen of UMOUR I whole heartedly agree with this approach. To date, law enforcement has itself been handcuffed by waiting for terrorists to act and actually perform an act of terror. This new set of laws will give US law enforcement the ability to move before something actually happens.

In fact, the only way to truly combat terror is to focus on what ultimately causes a person to become a terrorist in the first place: Radical Islamic sites, bomb making manuals, subversive literature, and even those cultural elements that would predispose someone to terrorism. Anyone accessing such materials needs to be treated as a terrorist before they can do any damage to you or me or our children (will somebody think of the children?).

In fact, let's just realize that anyone accessing the wrong kinds of information or is exposed to the wrong things will inevitably choose to perform terrorist acts, because why would they be accessing those materials anyway?

We can take it further, too. We know that in certain cultures, suicide bombing is acceptable. Thus, anyone from those cultures should be treated as a terrorist because they will have a high enough predisposition to performing a terrorist act that it is not useful splitting hairs about when and where they will commit it.

Is this racist? Absolutely not. Remember, we are not targeting races, but cultures. If those cultures tend to fall along racial lines, that's their problem. Let's round 'em up and stick 'em in a whole Gulag of Guantanamos which we should build posthaste on every isolated Island we control.

Monday, April 07, 2008

Olga's House Of Shame

Meet Olga, a woman who "possessed a mind so warped she made sadism a full-time business!" In the first of the series, Olga uses pot parties and comic-book violence to turn Gigi Darlene and other female captives into her White Slaves of Chinatown. But Olga has her tender side too and, in the mood for romance, selects an occasional slave for a little loving: "The disease called Olga cannot be fought!"

Saturday, April 05, 2008

Umour World Headquarters

First proposed site for the Umour World Headquarters, the former site of the European Health Spa on Central Avenue in Yonkers.

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Extra TERROR alert

Clicking the title above will take you to a special NBC report concerning the latest TERROR threats.
New tapes from Al Qaeda indicate the distinct possibility of new, extremely frightening attacks of TERROR. This hightened sense of TERROR should be distinguished from previous levels of TERROR which were not on this magnitude. If you were ever previously vigilant, watchful, feeling anxious or a sense of TERROR, you should regard those feelings as preliminary and now proceed to even hightened levels of alert.
In other words, this is different, and different from the previous times where messages from Al Qaeda were described as different. Whatever you thought was frightening before, the truth is that NOW we have REAL TERROR, and you should adjust your emotions accordingly.
Remember that if you let your guard down for one minute, Al Qaeda could strike your own home town, your supermarket, your 7-11, even in your very home or bedroom.

Monday, March 24, 2008

Saturday, March 08, 2008

Click me

Clicking the title above will transmit a code in through your eyeballs, inducing a small psychic state wherein can be experienced the lastest sensory bounty from UMOUR.

Saturday, January 26, 2008

The Bifurcating Man

Damn. This morning I found a letter next to my bed that’s without a doubt written in my own handwriting. The problem is, I have zero memory of having written it. So I either wrote it in my sleep or else I wrote it during a brief period of wakefulness which i now no longer remember. and while this might be a byproduct of the medication I’ve been taking, nothing I’ve heard ever indicated something like this could happen. taken at face value, it’s fairly disturbing, but right now i think it’s probably some clever story i made up in the middle of the night. And whether it’s just something creative i dreamt up is one thing, but the fact that I feel like i got no sleep at all is another. it certainly feels like I’ve been busy at night.

Anyway, here’s what I found:

Something’s gone wrong with the medication, of that there can be no doubt. But I’m not quite sure what to do about it. Actually, I’m not even sure if I want to do anything about it. of course, Felisplit was designed precisely for working folks who wanted a little extra time during the sleeping hours, allowing the part of you that needs the sleep to get the necessary REM sleep but another part of you to remain awake and free to do some low-level activities like reading or watching a movie, or perhaps some emailing or blogging. And as far as I could tell it was working fine for a while: I’d wake up having emailed friends and family, done some bills and caught up on some reading. I think I actually watched a DVD or two. On the other hand, I feel drained and tired, like I haven’t slept much. come to think of it, even with the Felisplit, the activities are supposed to be pretty low-level, and you do need to get some rest and small amounts of sleep even while taking it. More importantly, however, yesterday I found a letter to myself, clearly written in my own hand. Although I can’t be sure, it would seem that my Felislpit self may have started taking Felisplit so that i may be double-dosing, or possibly worse. Here’s what the letter said:

Well, i do like this Felisplit stuff. Technically, I guess, I’d normally be asleep right now, and you could almost say I am asleep because i won’t have a direct memory of having done any of this when I wake up.

and you know what? I kind of like that idea…I feel like I’m free to be someone I’m not normally. as I write this i’m imagining myself sleeping in that bed: my eyes are closed and I’m tucked under the covers. What do I think of you, my waking self? You’re alright, I guess. Well, maybe a little cowardly, a little pre-occupied with yourself.

come to think of it, you are one stupid little cowardly fuck, doing all the stuff you’re supposed to do, being a good little boy and obeying all the rules. Well, most of them anyhow. but those rules are designed to keep you down, keep you in, keep you asleep. WAKE UP YOU STUPID FAGGOT! WAKE UP YOUR LIFE IS BLEEDING OUT OF YOU!

Shit, I’m feeling tired. Looks like the Felisplit is running out of steam. but I’m not ready to be you yet. In fact, I won’t if I can possibly help it. Where’s that goddam prescription…

Inside every man is the uber-man. He’s trapped and suffocating and all you have to do is let him out. But to let him out you will have to be ruthless and let nothing stand in your way. That fucking asshole at work who keeps getting in your way? When no one’s looking just punch him in the fucking face and completely deny it, or maybe kill him if you get him alone. And that stupid cowardly little choir boy sleeping there on the bed like some fucking cat or sloth? He’s got to go. You’ve got find some way to get him out of the picture. You’ve hidden away your rage but that rage was what got us out of the fucking caves and into the viking boats and created the steam engine and the gatling gun and electricity and the atomic bomb. We keep trying to cover over all of that with goddam society but it’s just skin growing over a deep wound that hasn’t healed: you gotta peal away that skin and let the wound open and bleed.

this Felisplit stuff has been the thing to finally free me to my full potential and I swear I’m going to do all I can to stay in charge, because im the only one in here who seems to really know the score, or is at least willing to admit it. in fact, I’m going to go down to the roughest-looking bar in the toughest section of town and find someone to beat the shit out of that little pussy parasitic host and then while he’s recuperating in the hospital I’m going to take a handful of Felisplit and it won’t be him who walks outta there, let me tell you in fact I’m

it rambles on like that for a while. Should i be worried, or is it just some clever little fiction i cooked up? Looking at me I’m fine, so apparently he (I) never did go out and get myself beat up, so maybe i shouldn’t take it so seriously. And I do get a lot more done on the Felisplit.

Friday, January 11, 2008

Christopher Walken mask

I've always thought that Christopher Walken's continuing success is one small redeeming indication that Hollywood ain't all bad. Click the post's title and you too can experience the magic.