Wednesday, December 21, 2005

The State Of The Union

Why in the world is anyone genuinely surprised that the Bush administration was illegally spying on Americans? Did anyone really think these bastards weren’t getting all KGB on your ass? Let me remind you: they lied the country into a fucking war. What exactly does anyone think they’re “not capable of”? But don’t think I’m smiling at the latest revelations. I fear there are dark days ahead. Believe me, I love to see the Bushie-boys squirm but the distressing fact is that if they really start to feel the heat, we can expect another “incident”. This is a greedy, amoral bunch of cutthroats with delusions of grandeur. They are “capable” of unimaginable atrocities. Buckle-up.

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

We need a new approach

From the link above it should be obvious that Satan is winning the war for the biology classroom, as the Pennsylvania courts have now officially ruled against intelligent design. So today they are teaching our children that their grandfathers were monkeys. Next they'll be teaching that our monkey ancestors worshipped Satan.

What we need is a new approach. If we can't beat Satan in the biology classroom, let's beat him in the others:

1. In English. Let's remove all those words Satan introduced into our language after the King James Bible. Let's ensure that "thee", "thine", "hither" "thither" and other Godly vocabulary and grammatical structures are taught instead of their new false versions that come from the pits of hell.

2. In electronics and technology. Since we know that the whole world is held together by God, we need to teach this in physics, astronomy and chemistry. Clearly, it is God's Word through the holy spirit that holds atoms together, not any Satanic forces of fire or electromagnetism. Likewise, Carbon 14 nuclei decay because has withdrawn his favor, not because of any process that has nothing to do with God. Carbon 14 radioactivity has increased since the fall and Adam and Eve's sin, which is why the deluded scientists of the world believe that the earth is 5 billion years old.

3. First Aid. We know that nothing that occurs in this world occurs without God. Therefore, the first response to any accident should be prayer and study of the Bible. If someone is choking it does not matter that the food is lodged in their windpipe. What matters is that God is pleased. First responders should be taught to repeat the ten commandments and the Lord's prayer before any attempt at ressuccitation is made.

Together, if we put God first in the classroom in all areas then our children will understand the truth of His word. Let's work together to abolish all lies and falsehood that the devil would teach our children.

Thursday, December 15, 2005


December 2005; Is there anybody out there who still believes that the Bush administration wasn’t, in some way, behind Sept. 11, 2001? Anybody?!! Didn’t think so… I mean just look at how they’ve used it and what they’ve used it for … and how ready they all were to switch gears. Believe me, I’m not one who accepts every wacko conspiracy theory. It’s hard to get around the fact that a plot of that size, possibly involving several countries, would be exceedingly difficult to pull off; and this isn’t the most competent administration ever to occupy the White House. It really does seem to be wishful thinking to assume convenient conspiracies lurking around every corner. However, I think it is just as na├»ve to fail to consider that they ever may exist. History shows us that there have been conspiracies, huge conspiracies, from time to time. Some conspiracies have been proven to involve collusion from several countries or national leaders. History teaches us that if the stakes are high enough, anything is possible. In this particular case, the stakes were thick and juicy indeed. Without 9/11: there would have been no invasion of Iraq… no hundreds of billions in fat military contracts (all going, of course, to supporters of the administration)… no controlling one of the world’s largest supplies of oil… no additional rip-off of public funds (going, again, to the administration’s corporate sponsors) for Iraqi “reconstruction”… no public-funds gift-to-the-wealthy (or, at least, not the second one)…no draconian, anti-democratic, police-state security measures… and probably, no reelection for four more years of plunder. Folks, when you consider the callous ways that they’ve used the tragic events of 9/11/01 to further their own agenda, you come up with only two possibilities; either Bush and his boys are the luckiest sons-of-bitches in history or that they made their own luck. Now my mama didn’t raise no fool and one thing I know is; if you want to find the RAT, just follow the CHEESE. In this case there’s a big, stinky pile of ripe toe-cheese sitting right in the Oval Orifice. So, you want a “plausible” scenario?… lemme paint you a picture:
Georgie and Papa HW and Uncle Dick and Rummie and some other pals were sitting around just shooting the shit one day when they got a brilliant idea. So they called up some old buddies in the family Saud. They said “We’re gonna run junior in 2000 and when he gets, er…”elected” there’s a great opportunity for a lot of us to make a whole shitload of money. We know the ways and we’re already cookin’ up some juicy means. Problem is, to implement these plans we need an… event, a big, splashy EVENT. That’s where you boys come in. To prevent any rivets from comin’ loose on the bass-boat, we don’t want to know any particulars… just the nuts-and-bolts: when, where, etc… maybe not even that much… so as we can act surprised and react with proper, righteous indignation after the fact. I mean, it’s gotta be a surprise, boys. Georgie ain’t no Ronald Reagan, if you know what I mean. If you need some ideas or logistical planning, we suggest that you talk to our buddies over in the Mossad, they’re particularly good at that sort of thing. Remember, we’re counting on you boys, so don’t fuck this one up… your seats on the gravy-train depend on it,”… or something to that effect. More plausible, at least, then the pablum we’re being offered.
Loudmouth Bill

Saturday, December 10, 2005

Red White and Blue Winter Holiday Song

(Sing roughly to the tune of “White Christmas”)

“I’m dreaming of a politically correct, thoroughly generic, non-denominational, winter holiday….
Not to offend a single soul.
To the liberals, moderates and conservative right,
May all your winter holidays be every color of the rainbow”.


Umour Ritual ForumSo Clinton got a Blowjob and lied about it… big fucking deal… and got Impeached. Bush lied us into a goddamn War- what’s worse?!! For four years the Right held-up the business of the United States by ceaselessly attacking Clinton over nothing. Now if Bush critics try to hold him accountable for the truly treasonous acts which are being committed daily during his reign (like lying us into a war, for instance ) we’re attacked for undermining the war effort, promoting teen pregnancy and letting bedbugs loose in the East Village. At some point here, one would hope, America will return to sanity and find it’s balls. You can do it right now- say it out loud- what you’ve all been thinking. Just open your mouths and yell it right out: that every day, in every way, I am reminded that George W. Bush is the worst President we’ve ever had in these United (barely ) States. That’s it, plainly, bluntly and succinctly; The Worst Ever! He combines the stupidity and incompetence of Warren G. Harding with the conniving evil of Richard M. Nixon and the religious hypocrisy of Ronald Reagan. However in this case, the total is even worse than the sum of these parts. While Harding was surely stupid, at least he was relatively benign. While Nixon was surely dishonest, at least he was intelligent and generally competent. Dubya is stupid, incompetent, hypocritical and evil. At the very least we’re all going to be paying the tab for this cretin for many years to come… that’s if we can prevent him from committing any more atrocities over the next three years; a big IF considering how virtually everything the guy has done has been wrong, on so many levels. Whether I harbored any prior prejudice against Dubya and his boys or not is not really germane… the facts are the facts… and in this case the Facts are quite damning indeed. Of course the administration is going to attack any good citizen who points them out. We’re Defeatists and Naysayers and Enablers and worse because we see the obvious reality which is staring us directly in the face. It’s like if your friends convinced you that you could fly and you got so enthralled with the idea that you actually went up on the garage roof and jumped… and through some lucky freak of nature you survived unhurt. Now the smart man or the reasonable man or even the basically sane would have to conclude two things: 1) Perhaps my friends were mistaken and I, in fact, can’t fly and 2) maybe I need some new friends. But Dubya isn’t smart or reasonable or even basically sane. He keeps jumping off that same roof, falling Splat on the ground and climbing back up again. Each time not only refusing to acknowledge that he can’t fly, that he never could fly but also attacking those who dare to point out the obvious, more and more virulently. “I’m an AMERIKAN and an AMERIKAN can do anything he sets his mind to… and I say I can fly”! The problem is, in the case of Dubya, it isn’t just one man’s vainglorious attempt to do the impossible, for that explanation is merely more Rovian myth-making. While the deluded dreamer is something we can admire, in a Don Quixote-esque sort of way, what we have here is something much more cheap, dirty and seemly. No, in this case Dubya is actually pushing YOU off the roof… and LAUGHING about it. “Heh, Heh, Heh… You got a little more height that time… Heh, Heh, Heh… Jes’ a couple more tries and I’m sure you’ll be soaring with the eagles… Heh, Heh, Heh. Now all you naysayers get offn my garage roof before sundown- My Daddy used to play a cowboy in the movies, you know… or maybe that was that other guy. “
It’s about time fi we have a REVOLUTION, mon!
Loudmouth Bill

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Umour Ritual Forum

Umour is essentially polemical not political in nature. Not that we aren't interested but more because we don't want to limit it to that specific discusson which becomes the inevitable result of "getting on politics". We want the items explored by the group to be of a deeper more universal and permanent nature. Contemporary political discourse is by definition topical, fluid and ephemeral. Umour observes the whole process of big P politics as another event/non-event scenario. However, this aesthetic detachment is only necessary for the group as a whole entity, not for each individual member personally. On that level, we are all people and citizens and are rightfully outraged by what is occurring in our country and world. Therefore on this blog page we should as individuals, feel free to express our personal opinions and observations. For those who might be interested in what the loudmouth has to say (if there is, indeed, anyone) please tune in to this ritual forum over the next few weeks. I intend to push my normally restrained and moderate nature aside and out the truth, whatever the cost. Contributions to my legal defense fund may be made payable to (or cash). Thank you and dog bless you. Umour, Umoure, Umouris.

Your humble servant,

Loudmouth Bill

Sunday, December 04, 2005

Umour Ritual Expedition to Gowanus Canal

Umour has completed it's initial survey of the Gowanus Canal area in Brooklyn, NY. Click/zoom/drag the map below to see the effort firsthand, working NE to SW.

Better yet, click into the map, zoom in in Satellite mode. (Click the title for a direct link to the map and popup photos.)

Pixagogo Photo Maps